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Unique Concerns in Gray Divorces
Many people in struggling marriages wait until later in life to divorce. Couples consisting of partners aged 50 and above now account for a full quarter of all divorces in the United States. Divorce between older individuals has been nicknamed “gray divorce,” and has been on the rise in this country for a number of years.
Couples get divorced after many years of marriage for various reasons. Some do not want to upset the family balance while there are children living at home. Others wait for financial or career-oriented reasons. Still others may have tried for a long time to salvage the marriage and finally decide to call it quits. While a divorce is a life-changing event for individuals of any age, waiting until later in life to get a divorce comes with its own special challenges.
Factors to Consider When Divorcing After the Age of 50
If you are 50 or older and are thinking about a divorce, it is important to keep a few things in mind:
Special Needs Trusts Protect Assistance Eligibility
For the more vulnerable members of society, especially the disabled and the elderly, life can become a complex dance of government forms and applications. Social Security (SSI/SSDI) is a prime example of this, with lengthy proofs required as to why disability is necessary and how to show you are not ‘gaming the system.’ However, the strictures of being on disability mean that a person is not entitled to possess assets above a certain amount, which can be prohibitive. Special or supplemental needs trusts (SNTs) have been used for years to help address this disparity.
What Is the Purpose of an SNT?
The primary purpose of an SNT is to help a disabled or elderly person afford better care than that to which they would otherwise be entitled. While Social Security disability (SSDI) has no asset limit, many people do not qualify for it, and instead apply to receive SSI (the program for low-income workers). However, when one is ruled eligible to receive SSI, one is entitled to retain only a certain amount of assets - for most people, no more than $2,000 in value. This is tenable for some, but for many others it amounts to enforced poverty. For those who are physically disabled, having such minimal assets and no ability to work (because a bank account and a paycheck are resources) can result in privation.
Getting Divorced? Do Not Forget About Your Estate Plan
For most couples, divorce is a difficult, time-consuming, and often expensive process. The considerations that accompany a divorce can seem almost endless, from determining who will keep which assets, how parental responsibilities will be divided, and whether spousal support is necessary. In the back of your mind, you probably realize that, at some point, you will need to update your will and other estate planning documents to address the property and obligations allocated to you during the divorce. But what if something were to happen to you before your divorce is finalized?
Your Estate Plan After Divorce
According to Illinois law, a divorce judgment will make certain changes to most estate planning documents in the event that a person dies before amending his or her estate plan. For example, if you named your spouse as the executor of your estate in your will and you pass away after your divorce has been finalized, the will shall be treated as if your spouse died before you. The same is true if your will left property to your former spouse, as well as if you appointed your spouse to be your power of attorney.
Modifying an Existing Support Order
If your income has declined in recent months due to a change in employment or other factors, you may be struggling to make your court-ordered child support or spousal maintenance payments. You may also be wondering if there is anything you can do about it. Can you go to the judge and have your child support and maintenance payments modified accordingly?
Changing these, and other, financial provisions in a divorce is possible under Section 510 of the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act (IMDMA). Any party to the case can ask the court to modify the existing order if there has been a “substantial change in circumstances.” The statute lists a number of specific factors, as well as the general inclusion of “any other factor that the court expressly finds to be just and equitable,” for the court to take into account.
Choosing Your Power of Attorney
As you look toward the future, you may realize that there could be a time when you are limited in your decision-making abilities. It may become impossible for you to express your wishes regarding your finances, property, and even your own medical care. To prepare for such a possibility, Illinois law allows you to select an individual to serve as your power of attorney for these types of decisions. Your power of attorney will have the authority to make decisions on your behalf if and when you are no longer able to do so.
The Right Person
The individual that you choose to serve as your power of attorney must be capable of handling his or her assigned responsibilities. This means that he or she should:
- Pay close attention to details;
- Be organized with money and other important decisions;
- Have an understanding of finances and/or health care and insurance, depending on the type of power of attorney;
Divorce and the Family Pets
Maybe he is your best hunting companion, spending countless hours together in the woods or tracking game. Maybe she likes to curl up on your lap while you watch television or against your body while you sleep. Companion animals like dogs and cats play such a significant role in the everyday lives of millions of people. You would never consider taking your leafblower hunting nor would you want to cuddle up with a set of silverware and cup of hot cocoa. However, if you are going through a divorce, most states recognize companion animals simply as property, no different than the household items in these impractical examples.
Working Together
Communication and compromise are important tools for any divorcing couple when making arrangements for parental responsibilities and the division of property. Placing a dispute in the hands of the court to decide can lead to contentious hearings and an outcome that leaves one or both partners unhappy. When custody of pets is at issue, however, compromise is even more imperative. While there are some small signs of change around the country, most courts are not nearly as concerned with a pet’s best interest as they are with that of a child.
Homework Concerns for Children of Divorce
Not many children get home from school excited to dive right into their homework. Almost every school-aged child has homework assigned at least a few nights per week and many have homework on weekends too. Under the best of circumstances, even the most dedicated students can get burned out. For a child dealing with their parents’ divorce, the issue of homework can become a battleground if the parents do not make the conscious effort to cooperate.
Parents want what is best for their children. In a divorce situation, emotions and stress can sometimes lead a parent to try to establish complete control over the child’s education and assignments. Children may benefit more, however, when both parents agree to each take responsibility, especially when their share custody during the school week. While the specific arrangements of any family situation will be different, there are a few things that divorced parents should strive to offer their children, regardless of whether the children are with Mom or Dad.
Five Difficult Questions That Highlight the Need for Estate Planning
It is never easy to think about our own mortality. In the back of our minds, we realize that we will not live forever, but the topic can certainly be uncomfortable and overwhelming. Unfortunately, this leads many people to procrastinate when it comes to estate planning, convincing themselves that they will address the issue when they are a little older or closer to retirement.
Sometimes, individuals need a wake-up of call of sorts in order to get motivated in their estate planning efforts. If you have not completed an estate plan yet, consider questions such as:
If you and your spouse both die, who will raise your children?
Estate planning is about much more than making arrangements for your assets and property. It also allows you to appoint a guardian for your minor children should something happen to both parents. If you do not make such arrangements, a judge you have probably never met will decide who gets to raise your children.
The Problem of Hidden Assets in Divorce
It is certainly not uncommon for divorcing spouses to fight over money. In many situations, finances are the only issue that keeps the divorce process ongoing—often for many months or even years. A large number of such cases include high-net-worth couples with significant assets and business interests, which can be very complicated to divide fairly. Other cases, however, involve one spouse hiding or obfuscating assets so that he or she will not lose them during the divorce.
Manipulating the System
Illinois law requires each spouse to make a full financial disclosure during the divorce process so that all marital property can be divided equitably. Too often, one spouse will attempt to leave certain assets or revenue streams out of his or her disclosure so that they will be “safe” from division during the divorce. This type of behavior defies the intent of the law regarding equitable distribution and is taken very seriously by the courts.
Your Rights to Receive or Refuse Death-Delaying Procedures
As you look forward to the future, you will need to make some important decisions about the disposition of your property and the care of your dependents. These are the considerations that most people think of when they hear the term “estate planning.” Estate planning, however, also gives you the ability to make advance decisions for your own medical care and treatment so that in the event that you are disabled or otherwise incapacitated, there will be no doubt regarding your wishes.
Your Living Will
A living will is one example of an estate planning document that can be used to formally record your desires regarding the medical care you wish to receive—or not receive—in specific situations. It is a type of advance medical directive that can be used to give instructions to your medical providers as well as to any person you have appointed to make medical decisions on your behalf, such as a power of attorney.
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