How to Survive a High-Conflict Divorce

 Posted on February 12, 2018 in Divorce

Upon reading the title to this blog post, you may be thinking to yourself that all divorces are high in conflict. This is certainly true. Divorce is the second-most stressful life even a person can endure and it often brings out the worst in people. However, although many who divorce have feelings of resentment, guilt, or anger, they are still willing to work toward a common goal. In high-conflict divorces, one or both spouses are not willing to work together and instead work to tear each other down. In this type of divorce, a couple engages in hostile confrontation instead of legal negotiation about the issues at hand. This can be nearly unbearable for a spouse who actually does want to reach conclusions about spousal support, child support, parenting time, or property division.

Reasons to Hope

If you are currently experiencing a high conflict divorce, or you might be in the future, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. While there is no way that you can change how you spouse reacts to a divorce, you can change yourself. There are a few guidelines that experts suggest can help spouses manage high-conflict divorces and reach the conclusion they desire.

Let Go of the Past and Plan for the Future

The first step in surviving a high-conflict divorce is to let go of the past. Obviously, if you are getting divorced, things probably have not turned out the way you planned. Take the time to accept that your marriage is over and that this may be for the best. Although you will have to let some dreams you had for your future die, this leaves room for new dreams and desires. Realize that you may never get the closure from your spouse that you deserve. He or she may never see your side of things, and that is okay. Instead of focusing on how you have been wronged, plan for the future. Perhaps there is a vacation destination you have always wanted to visit or a hobby you wish to take up. Begin to focus on your future and you may notice that you are less and less upset by the present.

Seek Legal Assistance from an Attorney You Trust

It can be dangerous to handle a high-conflict divorce on your own – especially If your spouse is adamantly attempting to ruin your life. Having an attorney means that you will not be taken advantage of by a malicious spouse. At our firm, we have the experience and skills necessary to handle high-conflict divorces and get our clients the outcome they desire. To meet with a dedicated Lombard family law attorney at A. Traub & Associates, call 630-426-0169 today.

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/anxiety-zen/201704/high-conflict-divorce-3-lessons-learned-the-couch

https://www.liveabout.com/what-is-a-high-conflict-or-malignant-divorce-1102461