Questions to Ask Yourself Before Filing for Divorce

 Posted on May 18, 2019 in Divorce

Whether it is a long time coming or a recent revelation, divorce is difficult. Leaving someone you have been with for years is difficult regardless of the quality of your relationship due to the familiarity in having a constant presence by your side. It can be challenging for people to separate their current reality from a nostalgic past. Because filing for divorce is one of the most serious decisions you can make, it is important to be absolutely sure that this is what you want and that this is what is best for everyone. Here is a list of questions you should ask yourself before signing official documents:

1. Have You Fully Communicated Your Concerns with Your Spouse?: As years of marriage continue on, communication can often get lost in translation. One spouse assumes that they know what the other is thinking due to past experiences. If divorce is on your mind, you should ensure that you have expressed your concerns with your spouse in order to avoid making a rash decision. Disclosing that your unhappiness has led you to consider divorce can sometimes be the wake-up call that spouses need after years of marriage.
   
2. Have You Tried Counseling?: Many married couples view seeking out counseling as a weakness. While it may cost your momentary pride, marriage counseling is an effective solution for many couples. Discussing difficulties within your marriage while a third-party is present can help provide another perspective and keep emotions in check. Counseling is often seen as a last-ditch effort but can be effective for many couples.
   
3. Why Do You Fear Ending Your Relationship?: One of the most common reasons for avoiding divorce is fear for the future. For some, potential loneliness keeps them from leaving. For others, their physical and financial dependency on their spouse forces them to stay. Identifying these fears is a step in the right direction to understanding why you are hesitant about filing for divorce.
   
4. Am I Using My Children as an Excuse?: Couples that have children often put off divorce “for the child’s sake.” Some believe that they are actually helping their children while others use this as an excuse to avoid confrontation and life changes. Studies have proven that staying together for your children’s sake can often be more detrimental to them than getting a divorce. Children are happier when they are in a healthy and happy household. Getting a divorce may be difficult for the child to adjust to, but this is often a healthier lifestyle than living with parents who are clearly unhappy together.
   

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Attorney for Help

Finally making the decision to file for divorce takes lots of self-reflection and consideration of the future. This decision can sometimes take years to make. For a complete life change like divorce, it is important to have experienced attorneys on your side. If you are considering divorce, contact our Lombard, Illinois, attorneys at A. Traub & Associates at 630-426-0196.

Source:

https://www.verywellmind.com/questions-before-you-leave-your-marriage-2302139