Tips for Maintaining a Relationship With Your Children After Divorce

 Posted on October 12, 2020 in Parenting

A divorce can not only change the lives of you and your spouse, it can affect your whole family dynamic. Your children will have to adjust to living in two different households, and the nature of your relationship with them may change, especially if you will not be spending as much time with them as you used to. However, your relationship does not have to deteriorate, especially if you continue to make an effort to foster love, trust, communication, and quality time with your children. Working with your co-parent can also help your children feel more at ease during this major life transition.

How to Keep a Close Bond With Your Children

As you and your children acclimate to life after your divorce, here are some things to keep in mind that can help you maintain a strong relationship:

• Listen to their concerns: It is understandable that your children may be upset with you after your divorce, or that they may be reluctant to talk to you about their concerns. However, you should make it clear that you are available to talk whenever they are ready, and when they do start to open up, make an effort to give them your full attention.

• Maintain a routine: Especially if you have a lesser share of the parenting time after your divorce, it can be tempting to try to fill the time with as many fun activities as possible. However, often what children need after a divorce is a familiar routine that allows them to spend normal, everyday time with you in addition to celebrating special occasions.

• Stay involved: Illinois law requires divorcing parents to reach an agreement on the allocation of parental responsibilities including decisions about matters such as your children’s education and extracurricular activities, but staying truly involved in your children’s lives requires a personal commitment beyond the legal agreement. Continue to find ways to support your children in their goals and bond over common interests.

• Avoid putting them in the middle: Dragging your kids into the conflict with your ex-spouse or making them choose a side is one of the easiest ways to damage your relationship with them. Make every effort to remain civil when your kids are present, and try to avoid speaking poorly of your ex in front of them.

• Make them a priority: Self-care is certainly important after your divorce, and you may eventually get involved in a new romantic relationship that requires some of your time and investment. Do your best to make sure that these things do not come at a cost and interfere with the time you have with your children.

Contact a Lombard, IL Divorce Lawyer

A divorce can be difficult for everyone involved, and it can significantly impact the parent-child dynamic. At A. Traub & Associates, we do our part to help parents maintain a strong relationship with their children by working with you to establish a parenting agreement that prioritizes your children’s interests and considers both parents’ needs. Call a dedicated and compassionate DuPage County family law attorney today at 630-426-0196 to schedule a confidential consultation.

Source:

https://www.healthychildren.org/English/healthy-living/emotional-wellness/Building-Resilience/Pages/How-to-Support-Children-after-Parents-Separate-or-Divorce.aspx