Recent Blog Posts
Are Children Really Affected by Divorce?
In 2003 an article published in USA Today reported that there were two growing but conflicting bodies of research that dealt with the reactions of children to their parents’ divorce. Judith Wallerstein, a psychologist and author, asserts that kids who come from divorced homes "lack role models for a healthy marriage," and that the majority grew up in homes where the parents stayed angry. Wallerstein, and those on her side of the debate argue that children from divorced households "entered adulthood as worried, underachieving, self-deprecating, and sometimes angry." She asserts that stepfamilies aren’t necessary good either, and can lead to bonding issues later in life, and that children with divorced parents experience greater levels of substance abuse and earlier sexual experiences. 
On the other side of the fence is developmental psychologist E. Mavis Hetherington, who recognizes the challenges of raising kids in divorced households but argues that the negative effects of divorce "are exaggerated while the positive effects are ignored." She cites the fact that 70 percent of adult children of divorce "say divorce is an acceptable solution to an unhappy marriage, even with children." Forty percent of adults from non-divorced families agree. It’s worse for kids with unhappy parents to stay caught in the middle of arguments and negativity than to have a happy, albeit "broken" home to grow up in.
Custody battle: children's online footprint
Stacy Thibodeaux, 45, of St. Peters, says she was furious when she found pictures of her children on her ex-husband’s online dating profile after their divorce. She confronted her ex, claiming that it was inappropriate to have their young children’s images on Match.com.
Following her confrontation, he simply blocked her from his profile.
Thibodeaux, who has recently remarried after being divorced for five years, said she realized that she could not control what her ex-husband did with their children’s pictures. It had occurred to her, however, that it may have been helpful to establish some ground rules about their children’s digital exposure as part of their custody agreement.
Managing a child’s online footprint is becoming part of many conversations during divorce and after custody settlements as social networks become a universal way to share information.
Ashton Kutcher- Divorcing and Dating
The former co-stars from "That 70s Show" had a very happy holiday together.
The couple first went to visit Kutcher’s family in his hometown of Cedar Rapids, Iowa for Christmas. Most recently, however, they were spotted in the Chicago suburb of La Grange, Illinois, having a "flirty brunch."
Kunis and Kutcher were spotted at Prasino, where the restaurant’s marketing director, Lauren Zeien, managed to get a photo of the newly public couple.
These two former co-stars have been dating since April, but only became public about the relationship this past fall. More recently, they have been spotted together all over the globe. Getting fro-yo in Iowa, sharing a romantic dinner in Rome, and hanging out together in the middle of New York City’s Central Park.
Sources from the Chicago area restaurant shared that Kutcher, 34, and Kunis, 29, seemed extra flirty during their lunch date. It was also shared that the famous couple was "very courteous to (the restaurant’s) staff." The couple shared the short rib skillet and the Florentine crepes.
Divorce and Depression
Divorce is rampant in our society. There are many reasons that couples decide to end marriages. One leading cause of divorce is depression in one spouse.
Roughly 15 million Americans, or 6.7% of the U.S. population suffer from depression. Depression is not something you can just snap out of, but rather a disease that needs to be treated. For the spouse who is living with a depressed spouse, things can quickly turn from a loving, fun marriage to a coping, care taking role in a marriage. This causes wear and tear on a relationship. No matter how committed one is to a marriage,giving all the time can hurt and cause resentment towards the spouse who has the depression.
Many couples realize that depression is a problem and may try counseling or other options as a solution. However, what leads to divorce is not the depression itself but rather, how the couple deals with it. Depression can just be a stepping stone to other problems such as anger, abuse and cheating.
Reasons to Wait until January to Divorce
According to a report by Reuters, it may be a good idea to wait until after the new year to file for divorce as opposed to doing it around the Christmas season. Many people would think that it is just about making the holiday a good one, however there are more reasons to consider waiting.
End of Year Bonus
If your spouse receives a holiday bonus from the job, they usually receive right around the Christmas time. Waiting until January makes those funds part of the family’s finances. Filing for the divorce before the disbursement of this money nullifies it from being community property. For some these bonuses can be pretty significant.
Emotions are Flying High
Emotions are always flying high during the holiday season as it is. Even though there are enjoyable times, it is also very stressful. You may have house guests and you may even see family that you only see once a year. This is not a good time to be going through divorce proceedings. Waiting until after the holidays helps both parties to keep a level head about the situation.
Dealing with Divorce during the Holiday Season
While Christmas is a special time of year for many, there are many others that are seeking solace from the pain of divorce. A report by the Huffington Post offers some great activities to help get over your ex and start the year anew with a better outlook on life.
Stocking Stuffer
If you have a Christmas stocking for your ex, it may be too painful to just throw it in the garbage. That may also make it confusing for the children. Instead, write yourself positive messages on small strips of paper and drop them into the stocking. When you are feeling down, pull a message from the stocking to remind yourself that things will get better! Make sure that you do this at least once a day.
Don’t Take Down the Mistletoe
Just because you don’t have a sweetie to kiss under the mistletoe does not mean that you shouldn’t have it hanging there. When your kids go under the mistletoe, give them the biggest hug and kiss that you can. Don’t forget to give yourself kisses too. Remember loving yourself is a part of the healing process.
Keep your Business together after divorce
A small business is more than just an asset to the owners; it generates income, but also is a physical representation of hard work and dedication that you have put into the business.
Divorce can be a very big threat to a small business. With the right strategies and help from the right people, however, you can ensure that your business survives the divorce and remains strong long afterward.
Strategy #1: Getting an accurate and complete business estimate is essential
According to Illinois law, family businesses are assets and, therefore, subject to equitable division in the case of divorce, just like any other marital property. Equitable division means that if both parties cannot reach an agreement, property will be split based on what the court deems fair, including factors such as the length of the marriage, the age, health, and income potential of each property, and the contributions of each spouse to the marriage. Equitable marriage does not mean a 50-50 split.
Christmas for the divorced
As we are closing in on Christmas celebrations, there is a group of people, who might not be enjoying this season, for a good reason, wholeheartedly. This group would be the recently divorced and separated. Divorce and separation are always stressful, especially with children, and having to figure out what is essentially a family holiday will not make it easier. If you look for them, you can quickly find a story addressing the issue.
The biggest factor that makes Christmas challenging for the divorced and separated is memories. Memories of past Christmases can make the thought of not having a traditional, family-style Christmas very painful. This does not, however, mean that Christmas could not be enjoyed even if your family is going through a divorce. You can always come up with new traditions, and having a challenging holiday season this year does not mean it will always be like that.
Surprisingly, Christmas and divorce do have one thing in common. Both are something you should not try to handle alone. To make Christmas easier, you can reach out to friends and family for support or enjoyable company during the holidays. As for divorce, you can still contact your friends and family for support, but it is important to also contact an experienced divorce attorney in your area.
A hardworking wife could mean you're headed for divorce, study suggests.
In the midst of all the far-fetched theories of omens and signs that your marriage is headed for a divorce, a U.K. study found that there is a possibility that some wives are literally working their way towards a divorce. For once, you are going to read about a sign that does not include a husband working suspiciously hard at the gym or a wife&s new enthusiastic approach to tennis. This new theory comes from a study conducted in the United Kingdom that suggests women whose marriages are about fail spend more time working. Aol. did a story on this discovery.
The study, conducted by the London School of Economics and Political Science, suggests that for a 1% increase of their marriage failing, women put in 12 more minutes of work in a week. Berkay Ozcan with his co-researches based the study on statistics from before and after the 1996 legalization of divorce in Ireland. The main idea was to compare women&s participation in the workforce before and after the legalization of divorce.
Former Bulls Great Ordered to Pay Child Support
Dennis Rodman was known as a rebounding machine before he joined the Chicago Bulls in 1995. While he played for the Bulls, he won three titles alongside Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen. His personal life was considerably wild; he was notorious for his "bad boy" persona and willingness to act outlandish both on and off the court. He ever showed up to a book signing in a wedding dress and claimed he was marrying himself in 1996.
In 1999, Rodman met Michelle Moyer who he had two children with in 2000 and 2001. They were married on his 42nd birthday in 2003. There union was tenuous, as Michelle filed for divorce in 2004 yet the couple spent years trying to reconcile. During that time, Rodman had multiple issues with alcohol and spousal abuse. The divorce was finalized earlier in 2012. At that time, Michelle claimed that Dennis owed back child and spousal support.
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