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What Needs to Happen After a Divorce
After a divorce is finalized you can feel worn out. Even when a divorce was amicable, the emotions involved can take a toll. But, after you receive the final paperwork from the court, you still have a few things to set in order. Failure to make a few changes to your estate planning documents, taxes, and retirement accounts now could have disastrous consequences later.
Estate Planning
Often, spouses list each other as the beneficiary on a variety of documents without even thinking about it. After you are divorced, you need to go and make sure all those beneficiary designations are changed from your now ex-spouse to someone else.
After a divorce is also a good time to draft a new will or amend an old one. With the breakup of your marriage, you may now feel differently about where your property should go when you die. Failure to draft a new will or trust may mean the documents fail at your death because the divorce made them impossible to execute. It could also mean your ex-spouse inherits some of your property.
Divorce Advice That May Do More Harm Than Good
When family, friends, or coworkers learn you are about to go through a divorce, it is natural for them to want to help. Sometimes, that help comes in positive forms—a shoulder to lean on, an offer to help out with the children, or even just space to cope with the emotional baggage that often accompanies a divorce. But advice, often given with the best of intentions, may not always be helpful for a divorcing couple. In fact, sometimes divorce advice can end up doing more harm than good.
Most Common Forms of "Bad" Divorce Advice
In most instances, bad divorce advice comes from those that truly do want to help. Unfortunately, they may not fully comprehend the emotional or legal repercussions of what they are suggesting. Thankfully, it is pretty easy to spot poor divorce advice because most will involve "shortcuts" of one sort or another. Examples may include tips like:
- "Why waste money on a lawyer? You can do everything yourself these days."
Child Representation: Attorney for the Child and the Child Representative
A few weeks ago, a post on this blog discussed the role and responsibilities of a court-appointed guardian ad litem, or GAL. However, the GAL is just one of several appointments that may be made by the court to assist with child-related legal proceedings, such as those for custody, visitation, or support. In place of a GAL, the court may appoint either an attorney for the child or a child representative, two roles that may sound very similar, but are, in fact, quite different from one another.
Attorney for the Child
A lawyer appointed as an attorney for the child is exactly that. He or she is the assigned legal counsel for the child as a separate party to the case. The normal attorney-client rules of confidentiality and procedure apply, meaning that the attorney is bound by his or her client’s wishes, regardless of the ability of the child to recognize their appropriateness. For this reason, an attorney for the child is not very likely to be appointed unless the court identifies that a minor child is mature enough to make considered, reasonable decisions.
Baby Before Marriage No Longer Increases Divorce Risk
Consider a common scenario: a young couple, dating but not engaged, suddenly discovers that they are going to have a baby. They certainly have options, but depending upon their age, maturity level and decision-making skills, they may not be able clearly think through the various possibilities. So, they inform their families. Just a few generations ago, and to an extent, probably even now, the families were likely to respond with some variation of "I assume you are going to do the right thing," heavily implying that marriage should obviously be the plan. This type of social pressure and the stigma of having a baby before marriage has, for many years, led to an increase the risk of divorce for such couples. Recent studies suggest, however, that this is not the case anymore.
Long-Term Research
Using data from the National Survey of Family Growth, researchers at Cornell University and the University of Michigan conducted a study published last month in the journal Demography. Led by Kelly Musick, associate professor of policy analysis and management at Cornell’s College of Human Ecology, the team closely examined child-bearing couples in two separate periods, from 1985 to 1995 and from 1997 to 2010. What they found was that the landscape of marriage, relationships, and childbirth has drastically changed in a relative short span of time.
Illinois Eliminates At-Fault Divorce
As of now, a married individual in Illinois can seek a divorce on the grounds of his or her spouse’s behavior. Of course, divorces on such grounds have grown relatively uncommon since the introduction of so-called "no-fault" divorce in 1984. Beginning in 2016, however, fault divorces, or those based upon the specific actions of one party will no longer be available in the state, forcing all marital dissolutions to proceed on the grounds of irreconcilable differences.
Current Law
Under the existing provisions of the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act, there are ten separate reasons upon which a fault divorce may be granted. By petitioning for divorce one of these grounds, the petitioner must show that his or her spouse:
- Was naturally impotent at the time of the marriage and continues to be so;
- Was still married to another at the time of the marriage;
Dating After Divorce: Consider the Children
Considering all that you have been through during your marriage and divorce, nobody should deny you the opportunity to pursue happiness in your post-divorce life. You have the right to enjoy your new situation to its fullest, and, for many, that may mean starting a new romantic relationship. Casual dating and even a new, serious love interest can be very beneficial for your health and self-esteem following a divorce, but there are some things to keep in mind, especially if you have children.
It May Take Time
While you may have the freedom to pursue dating relationships after your divorce, you may not be ready for it immediately. This, of course, depends on what type of dating you are considering and your own emotional health. If you are ready to casually meet people for dinner and drinks on occasion, you probably have nothing to worry about. If you move directly from your marriage into another long-term serious relationship, you may want to give it a second thought, as you may not have healed yet from psychological impact that is usually inherent in divorce.
Understanding the Potential Impact of Social Media
Never before in human history have people been as connected as they are in the Digital Age. While sociologists will argue for decades over the perceived depth or superficiality of relationships facilitated by social media, there is little question that society has changed as a result. In most situations, liking or sharing photos and posts on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter may be relatively harmless, but it is absolutely critical to understand the power of social media in the midst of legal disputes and divorce, in particular.
Before You Click Send…
…remember that you cannot take back what you are about to post. Anything you share to a social media site, or really, even most internet-based applications, have the potential to remain permanent. Yes, you may be able to delete a post or a picture, and certain apps like Snapchat purport to only keep your information for a few seconds at time. However, all it takes is for a single person to capture a screenshot of your post and your control over its permanence is totally lost.
Child Representation: The Guardian ad Litem
If the court presiding over your child custody or visitation dispute has appointed a guardian ad litem to your case, it is important to recognize the significance of such an appointment. It is also helpful to understand the guardian ad litem’s role so that you can be prepared to work closely with him or her in the fulfillment of the assigned duties. When utilized properly, a guardian ad litem can be a valuable resource in finding a workable, healthy resolution to any child-related legal matter.
What is a Guardian ad Litem?
Under Illinois law, only a qualified attorney can be appointed as a guardian ad litem (GAL) in family law cases. The attorney must also be properly trained and certified to serve in such a capacity, as required by the county or jurisdiction. Once appointed, the GAL works as an extension of the court and not as legal counsel for any party to the case. He or she is expected to determine a recommended outcome that will serve the best interests of the child and then to present that information to the court as, essentially, an expert witness.
How Does Annulment Work in Illinois?
Under certain circumstance a marriage can be ended by an annulment or, as it is legally called in Illinois, a declaration of the invalidity of a marriage, instead of a divorce. An annulment means that, legally, the marriage never happened. There is no property division or spousal support when an annulment is granted. But, very few circumstances qualify for an annulment.
Annulment Requirements
The law presumes that a marriage is valid in most instances. You can only get an annulment in Illinois to a marriage performed in Illinois. Justifiable reasons for seeking an annulment include:
- One spouse cannot legally consent to the marriage;
- One spouse cannot have sexual intercourse and the other spouse did not this before the marriage;
- One of the spouses is under 18 and failed to get the proper parental permission; and
- The marriage is illegal.
Illinois Child Removal Laws Changing
A parent with primary physical custody of his or her child in Illinois will soon be subject to more stringent limitations regarding a move to a new residence. The changes are part of a larger family law overhaul passed by the state legislature earlier this year, and signed in July by Governor Bruce Rauner. Scheduled to take effect in 2016, the new amendment looks to address a loophole of sorts that has existed for years in Illinois law that, as of now, gives a custodial parent the freedom to move anywhere in the state without prior approval.
Two-Parent Involvement
Most of the provisions regarding family law in Illinois emphasize the best interests of a child and the positive impact of a healthy relationship with both parents. In almost every situation regarding custody and visitation, a court is required to consider how its decision will affect the parent-child interaction for both the custodial and non-custodial parent. The current law does address a parent who wishes to move with the child, but only if the move is to a location outside of the state. On in-state moves, the law is silent. This potentially means that a parent could move from northern Chicago nearly 300 miles to East St. Louis, and according the provisions in the law, be entirely within his or her right to do so. The only exception would be if the custody order in force specifically prohibited the move.
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